Today I was struck by an image of my daughter toddling out of the bathroom with light brown pigtails pointing straight out each side of her head, checkered button-up shirt layered with a pink turtleneck and denim flare jeans on…with a matchbox car in each of the back pockets…dragging her "blank" behind her, pacifier in mouth. As she waddled away, little pigeon-toed pink socks padding softly on the wood floor, I thought how precious this moment is, how precious each age and stage is and how grateful I am for this little girl, this toddler that will grow up to be a woman and whose companionship I hope to always hold close. One of the many things motherhood has taught me is the temporariness of life…

It's a shame that I don't always have these moments of clarity throughout every minute of my day, especially in the middle of my 3-year-old's meltdowns or when my 1-year-old is running away from me as I'm attempting to change her dirty diaper…being 8-months pregnant. Despite the fact that I struggle with some of the uncertainty that can come along with practicing NFP, I am finding out more and more what a blessing it is to be out of control of situations, because it makes me rely solely on God and not my own abilities, wisdom, or strength. Looking back, there are so many decisions that, if they would have been left to me, would have had led me down a completely different path. I am so grateful that God knows what I truly need to be happy, and what my soul needs to grow in holiness if I only say YES to Him!

"Only when God's spirit lives within us to the fullest, are we able to be most fully human. The only way to be filled with God's spirit is to empty ourselves of any false sense of who we are, or who we think we ought to be." – Michael Dubruiel

Last Call, Love, and Lent

Behind these three L words:

Did anyone realize it's the last week of lent (well before Holy Week starts)?

Anyone feeling weak in their noble resolutions they made five weeks ago? Or anyone simply feel in a slump or wishing they lived their lent better.

Me! Me! Me! (I'm raising my hand.)
I was thinking about this for a few days now and by God's grace several things came to mind:

1. There's a parable Christ tells of a master calling servants in the morning, afternoon, and at night, with only an hour left in the day of work. The master pays them all the same wage.
   
2. My three year old son, has every desire to get dressed by him-self these days, but try as hard as he may, he simply needs my help. He can't do it by himself.
   

Ha, this describes how I, with God's grace, am going to make this a good lent in a nutshell.

Last Call: I can still come up to the bar at last call and get a drink. It's the fifth week of lent, the last hour of work, and I can still ask Christ for a day's wages, a tremendous amount of grace for my soul.

Love: I read this in my meditation this morning.
St. Therese of Lisieux in Her Last Conversations:
Look at little children: they never stop breaking things, tearing things, falling down, and they do this even while loving their parents very, very much. When I fall in this way, it makes me realize my nothingness more, and I say to myself: What would I do, and what would I become, if I were to rely on my own strength?
I understand very well why St. Peter fell. Poor Peter, he was relying on himself instead of relying only on God‟s strength. I‟m very sure that if St. Peter had said humbly to Jesus, "Give me the grace, I beg you, to follow you even to death," he would have received it immediately. I‟m very certain that Our Lord didn‟t say any more to his Apostles through his instructions and his physical presence than he says to us through his good inspirations and his grace. He could have said to St. Peter: "Ask me for the strength to accomplish what you want." But no, He didn't because He wanted to show Peter his weakness, and because, before ruling the Church that is filled with sinners, he had to experience for himself what man is able to do without God‟s help.
Before Peter fell, Our Lord had said to him, "And once you are converted, strengthen your brethren." This means: Convince them of the weakness of human strength through your own experience.

Wow. I love Peter.

Dear Peter, thank you for being weak enough to fall because you were relying on your own strength, even with God himself right in front of you. How stupid of you….oh wait – I'm so like you!
I'm like a little kid who knows how much God loves me and yet I still fail. I rely on my own strength. I get nowhere and fall often.

Lent: The whole purpose of lent is MERCY! Second chances, forgiveness, the thief who "stole" heaven because he asked for forgiveness minutes before he died….WE STILL HAVE TIME. HE STILL LOVES US. HE WAITS TO BESTOW MERCY for those who ask.

LET'S GO! For all of us who may be far behind, for those of us who failed, lived lent half hearted, or are saying, "what? How is Easter next week already?"

AMEN to MERCY….Here's to the BEST LENT EVER – Starting this week!

Let us all pray for one another,

Maria

Do Your Research

Dear Moms and Moms-to-be,

As a follow up to my previous post on the Bradley Birth Method, I wanted to share a few tidbits for you to think about and DO YOUR RESEARCH on.

Do you know anyone who has had a jaundice baby? A Colic baby? A baby whose tear ducts need to lanced? A baby that can not nurse well? A baby who is having difficulty with congestion and breathing?

I am not saying I have all the answers here. We are blessed to have the care of our doctors when our children are born in case there is something wrong - again, in case there is something wrong. However, like myself I have been so unaware of the many procedures that the medical staff does to the baby after they are born, that maybe I should prepare myself for!

For instance, it is important to keep the cord attached to your baby for AT LEAST 10 minutes after the baby is born, but best for 30 minutes - if the doctor allows. The reason is that more than 20% of the baby's blood and nutrients are still being given to the baby after the baby is born. This can reduce tremendously the chances of your baby being jaundice, left with too many red blood cells, and a colic baby. Check it out!

Also, did you know that after the baby is born they use that blue suction bulb to remove excess fluid. In most cases that is not needed, because the baby naturally releases those fluids when being pushed through the birth canal. If you have a "snorty baby" who seems like they have a cold, it could be that the mucous membranes were damaged when suctioning your baby. And in severe cases if they use a suctioning tube, your baby's air passage can be damaged. It just isn't always necessary! Check it out!

Finally, the gooky medicine they put on your baby's eyes after they are born called erythromycin is used for mothers who have not had prenatal care and are putting their children at risk from being in contact with STD's, is not needed in most cases of mothers who have had prenatal care. They give your baby erythromycin, but did you know that it can clog your baby's tear ducts, causing them to be lanced - sometimes several times - later childhood. You know your body, right? Is this necessary? Check it out!

Do the research moms and dads. Be sure that your birth and parenting experience is the best it can be. I am praying for all of you and healthy children!

God Bless,

Luci

Spice Up Your Old Pack n Play

Aren't these fun? I saw these playard covers on the show "Shark Tank". They come in different colors and designs and you simply put them over your pack and play. I thought it was such a clever idea, especially if you have an old one you want to look new again or take to a hotel to be germ free. Check them out: http://www.coverplayard.com/

Eat Well For Your Baby! - Luci Klare

I have started going to the Bradley Birth classes, which teaches mothers and fathers how to prepare their bodies for a natural drug-free way of having a baby. The benefits of this class is not only how to handle labor and delivery, but also how to prepare your body long before you get pregnant, during pregnancy and afterwards. The class focuses on helping pregnant couples obtain the birth experience they truly desire... AND gives great tips and lots of input on the benefits of breastfeeding.

The first class focused on the importance of nutrition - the foundation of a healthy pregnancy. AS MANY of you know, I was pregnant with twins last summer. I was so focused on my girls during the pregnancy, that I forgot to focus on myself - which also benefits the baby! I ended up going into labor at the hospital weighing in at a WOPPING 220 lbs... yep! I started my pregnancy at 145 lbs and ended at 220... you do the math. The comforting part was I was having twins. The uncomfortable part is I was suffering from the onset of toximia! A very dangerous and sometimes deadly condition for both mom and baby that I was unaware of.

So I would like to share with you what I have learned as far as taking care of your body. We can prevent so many health scares to mom and baby just by eating the right amounts of foods. Follow some of these simple rules before and definitely during and throughout your pregnancy and decrease the risk of gestational diabetes, toximia/preeclampsia, deformity etc...

Every day of the week you and your baby should have:

1. One quart (4 glasses) or more of milk. Any kind will do: whole milk, low fat, skim, buttermilk, or cheese, yogurt, ice cream (yummy) etc....

2. Two eggs, (hard boiled, in french toast, or added to other foods).

3. Two servings of fish or seafood, liver chicken, lean beef, lamb or pork, beans or anyy kind of cheese.

4. Two good servings of fresh green leafy vegetables: mustard, collard turnip greens, SPINACH, lettuce, or cabbage.

5. Four slices of whole wheat bread, cornmeal, cornbread, or tortillas.

6. A piece of citrus fruit or glass of juice of lemon, lime, orange tomato, or grapefruit.

7. Three pats of butter

8. Other fruits and vegetables

Also include in your diet:

1. A serving of whole grain cereal such as oatmeal or granola.

2. A yellow or orange-colored fruit or vegetabble five times a week.

3. Liver once a week. (if you like it)

4. Whole baked potato three times a week.

5. Plenty of fluids, water, juice etc.

6. Slat food to taste for a safe increase in blood volume.

You may substitute proteins if you wish, being sure your proteins are complete, and that you get approximately 100 grams per day, If you substitute, also be sure all the elements necessary for a well balanced diet are available every day.

And just to keep you motivated of what NOT TO GET TOO!!! LOL... Here is a picture that one of my best friends Melanie Pace took. She and her husband shot our wedding, this lovely picture and as well as the precious moments when our daughters were born. You can find that story on http://www.loft3pd.com/.

~ love you and praying for the best for all moms... LUCI

Remember that you are from ashes and to ashes you will return.

I have entered into my second trimester of the pregnancy. I am 15 weeks today. It is amazing how quickly time is flying by. I find myself doing daily comparisons of this pregnancy compared to being pregnant with little Hopie and Gracie. For all the obvious reasons... Last year at this exact same time, Chris and I found out we were having conjoined twins. That was a pain like no other. And this pregnancy I am waiting, waiting, waiting to find out if this child is healthy and what the sex is. Everything about this pregnancy is going along as wished for. When I was pregnant with Hope and Grace I was tired and sick all the time. I hibernated for four and half months. I grieved and sobbed almost on a daily bases because I didn't know what to expect from day to day. This pregnancy feels too easy. I feel guilty for that. I have more energy, I am rarely ever sick, and when someone asks me how everything is going, I say, "Great"! But really in my heart I miss Hope and Grace and wish I had them crawling all around me and getting them excited for their new baby sister / brother.

It is a daily struggle to stay positive. But I am. I know my daughters miss me as much as I miss them. I know that they are just as elated as this new baby grows daily inside of me. I stay positive about having a healthy baby - as odd as this may seem. A part of me continuously prepares myself for another devastating loss. But I try to keep reminding myself that it is not the amount of breathes we take that count, but the moments that take our breath away!

****Ash Wednesday mass was such a good reminder to me of that saying. As I feel this looming loneliness for my daughters and for this new baby, I am reminded that it is a great preparation of my soul. God is preparing my soul - hopefully for heaven! As the priest marked my forehead with a black cross made of ashes and said the words, "Remember that you are from ashes and to ashes you will return." My heart filled with emotion as I could understand more profoundly this gift of life versus eternal life.

I walk this world alone. No one can walk it for me. I feel this pain for having given birth to my daughters and having to let them go, that no one else will ever know. I will walk alone as I carry each child and develop a love that will be different for each one - but none more than the other. I will be the only one to love my husband, the way I do. No one will ever know how much I long to hold his hand or what it means to me to share a kiss that only we can share. And no one will be able to walk my path to heaven. Each path is different and you must walk it alone, as Jesus did. I must say, that I desire heaven more than I ever have. My girls are there.

I thank the Lord for giving me my carrot to chase to that I may always be reminded of what is waiting for me there. However, before my journey is complete here I have to continue my path in this world to get to heaven.

Thank you Lord for these joys of life. Thank you for my faithful and loving husband. Thank you for allowing me this humbling gift of being able to carry a child in my womb and give birth. Thank you for my family and friends who give me such wonderful examples of how to chose to walk the path which leads me to you. Thank you for everyday in which I can learn what makes you happy and brings you joy, so that when I get to heaven I can present them to you.

Why Most Families Have 2 Children - by Lindsey

I read this and couldn't help but to share her thoughts and to summarize:

"I write to encurage young and older mothers to keep going. One more life. One more soul. A whole new person. The possibilities in one person are breathtaking. I meet so many women who wished they would have had more children, but I've never met a woman who wished they didn't have so many. God gave women the gift of fertility really for a few short years in the perspective of a lifetime. I pray that I reasure this gift and use it wisely."


Check out her blog http://www.mychildiloveyou.blogspot.com/ Or read her post below:

This could end up being a controversial post, but not intended to be. The average American household size is 2.5 persons with the average household having .90 children. Wow! When I looked up this statistic tonight, I was shocked by the number. The number of children per household has drastically fallen since I last checked about 10 years ago.

Not until I had children did I ever understand why people only had two children. In my dreamy world, I grew up wanting hundreds of children. Truly. I dreamed of a home full of children and babies. I didn't understand the realities of motherhood at all. I didn't know what it felt like to have morning sickness. I didn't understand how pregnancy is hard for most people and very scary at times. I didn't know what it felt like to be up all night for several weeks at a time with a new baby only to be woken in the morning by a very rested 2 and 3-year old. I never thought about those things. I didn't know what the pain felt like to hover over a sick child worried to death. I didn't know what it felt like to continually ponder a child's future and formation. You see, I was confident and ignorant. Then, I had children.

I had my first child and fell desperately in love. Like most mothers with their first, I was meticulous about everything. I made sure I read to him 40 hours a day, taught him baby sign language, made all his baby food, took him outside everyday, and read every parenting book to make sure that I wasn't messing him up for life. Looking back though, I was very overwhelmed. You see, when a woman gets married and has children, the life you once knew has now completely changed. Your life is not your own anymore...forever. You are now responsible for entire human being. I remember thinking when he was sick for the first time, "If I don't take him to the doctor, nobody will." You have to make serious decisions about things like vaccinations, schooling options, medicated or unmedicated birth, allergies, parenting techniques (i.e. to spank or not to spank), sleeping troubles, temper tantrums, eating issues, etc., etc. There is no barometer in motherhood. You do not get a medal at the end of the day that says, "Well done, you handled that fit well" or "Well done, you chose wisely on the vaccination decision" or "Great diaper change!" So, for the first time in lives of most women you are faced with a scenario that makes most feel like they started preschool again only this time the textbooks are on the level of your post-doctorate.

It seems around the 2-year mark, most people venture out and have another child. BAM! ENTER... why most people never go beyond this point of having more than two children. Yes, I know, some say it is for other reasons i.e. financial, challenging pregnancies and even scary pregnancies. Although, when you get into deep conversation with a woman, you see the longing and the loneliness on her heart for more children. She may not even know it. For me, I had my first child whom I gave ALL MY ATTENTION. I then had another child WHOM I FELT AS THOUGH I HAD TO GIVE ALL MY ATTENTION. This truly was an impossible task. Who can do that? I remember when I would go anywhere I would make sure I had army of people to help. Truly. I admired mothers of large families and felt so inadequate next to them. I would be at the zoo with my two children and six of my sisters to hold each of their arms and legs and possibly breathe for them...if they needed that. Then, I would see mothers of ten children...GET THIS...BY THEMSELF AT THE ZOO...and actually smiling. When we lived in Oklahoma, I would pack enough toys for the eight hour drive so that they would have something new to look at every 2.3 minutes. It was ridiculous. At mass, we would bring a buffet so that not a moment would go by that HOUR that he wasn't eating or looking at something. I would NEVER drive anywhere more than an hour by myself because HE MIGHT CRY OR SOMETHING and that just isn't right.

It is the first time in motherhood you are experiencing a toddler and then also having a new baby. My mom always says that most babies become normal at their one year birthday. Meaning, I have seen it time and time again. You have this sweet, beautiful, innocent baby who does everything he is supposed to for his first year of life and then...something happens. They start developing opinions. How dare they start thinking for themselves? Suddenly, they throw fits in public, arch their back, lay on the floor, climb on everything, go fishing in the toilet, become a picky eater. They are a mess and you are mess. I remember one of my dear friends crying at her sons baby pictures because he had morphed into some sort of something his second year of life. Never before are you faced with constant decisions on how to handle the octopus that now lives in your home. On top of that, you have a new baby who decides that the middle of the night is his favorite hot spot. Side note, the toddler whom has been sleeping in the other room for 13 hours didn't get the memo and still wakes up for party time at 6:00 AM. How come he didn't know that you just fell asleep around 5:30 AM?

Really, who would do this again and again? You are so tired and overwhelmed that you know that God doesn't want someone to exist in such a way. You will say, "I'm not being a good mom to the two I have, why would I have more?" "I can't imagine feeling this way the rest of my life." "I can use my talents in much more productive ways besides having more children." "I was much more patient before I had children." "I am of no use to anyone in such a state." This little voice in your head is not from God. It is the devil trying to discourage you from THE MOST IMPORTANT WORK you will ever do.

You see, like every new job something begins to change after two children (some say three children, but most say two). You begin to settle into your new job. All your little fears and questions really aren't present anymore. You start seeing trends with your children and know that usually "this too shall pass." You begin to have a peaceful acceptance of your promotion and begin to look at it as such. How come I felt more overwhelmed with one than I do with six children? How come I wouldn't think much about driving 8 hours by myself with all of my children, but a few short years ago, I wouldn't have driven 30 minutes with one? How come I will drive to see my mom three hours away and each child will only bring one book to look at and be content the whole drive when in the past they had a toy for every 5 minutes and most trips were very hairy and stressful?

YOU BEGIN TO CHANGE. You begin to see each child very differently. You begin to look at your oldest as not being five-years-old, but as only having 13 years left at home and that takes on a whole new perspective. You start cherishing their baby hood and know that most things are phases. You start realizing how fast it really is going and you start to slow down. You know that they will eventually sleep and even if they don't, it suddenly and weirdly becomes "okay." Why does that happen? When I just had Dominic and was getting up with him in the middle of the night, I truly was the most tired person in America. Really. I would take two naps a day because I thought I was so tired. You adjust. I don't feel anymore tired now than I did with just one. You just keep going and God keeps you going. A very wise mother of nine told me, "The days are long and the years are short." I want to change it to "Some days are long, but to me the years are way too short." You begin to see things changing from one season to the next, and you start to change. You will say, "Just last summer, he loved to ride his bike outside, now he is more quiet and wants to stay inside while we go out."

You see, these are the lessons in the school of motherhood. With each new child, you are promoted. God chips away at us and refines us and makes us beautiful. Why are mothers of large families edifying? Why do we want to be near them? Do not misunderstand my words that mothers of two children have nothing to teach us. That is not what I am saying. What I am saying that with any job, usually the person whom has been there the longest and has the most experience is pretty wise.

There are those who want children and can't conceive. Are people not wise unless they have children and especially "lots" of them? No, not at all. Everybody has something to teach us. I am not here to pat myself on the back (I am still a work in much progress). I am here to encourage and simply say keep going. The world tells you to stop. My whole point is simply that if you are blessed with the gift of fertility, please let us see it as such. If for some reason, God decides not to give us anymore children, I pray that we use our lives to glorify Him in whatever avenue he chooses to take us down. I have many friends and family members whom have not been given children yet, but glorify God beautifully through their lives with their openness to adoption and other great works.

I write to encourage young and older mothers to keep going. One more life. One more soul. A whole new person. The possibilities in one person are breathtaking. I meet so many women who wished they would have had more children, but I've never met a woman who wished they didn't have so many. God gave women the gift of fertility really for a few short years in the perspective of a lifetime. I pray that I treasure this gift and use it wisely.

My brother Dominic was born seventh in our family. Little did my parents know that a few 18 years later, he would be caring for my father during his last days on this earth. The scenes I saw with Dominic and my dad still make me cry. To see a young, strapping 18-year-old lift his crippled father into his wheel chair all the while giving him such beautiful dignity. I would see Dominic turn and cry so often. It was so moving. What a gift and privilege Dominic had to take care of him. John's uncle Fran is the third youngest of twelve children. He is a physician and has spent many years doing mission work in Australia for the poorest of poor. He has repaired peoples lives with his gift of medicine. He has restored vision and hearing to hundreds. One life, his life, has changed many lives. I believe all work is important, but nothing is more important than bringing souls to this earth with the possibility of eternal existence with God forever.

I beg you to realize how privileged you are as a woman to even have children. Let us give God our whole beings without reserve and let Him write the story of our lives and the lives he chooses to bring. For some reason, God does not let us know the end of the story of our lives. So we must trust. As Mother Teresa said, "I want to be a pencil in his hand."